Unwanted Energy: The Behavioral Science of Invisible Stress

What if emotional exhaustion isn’t always about doing too much, but about absorbing too much that isn’t yours?

We’re constantly connected, not just through phones, but through something far more subtle: psychological Wi-Fi.

The moment we step into a room, we start picking up on invisible emotional signals. Especially when that energy is shaped by tension, insecurity, and judgment - they travel silently, syncing with our nervous systems, without permission.

It’s like emotional secondhand smoke you didn’t light it, but you’re still breathing it in. The World Health Organisation (WHO) indicates that over one in eight people globally live with a mental health condition.

But what if part of that emotional strain isn’t even ours to begin with? We often absorb the moods, frustrations, and insecurities of those around us without realising it, leaving us feeling the awkward weight of unwanted energy.

In extending psychology, behavioral medicine offers a helpful lens as a response to 'absorbed' energy. Behavioral medicine, an interdisciplinary field that explores the connection between our behaviors, emotions, and physical health, is a key part of the health equation.

By applying the strategies offered by behavioral medicine, we can develop a deeper inner awareness and learn to skillfully manage the emotional energy we absorb from others.

This newfound awareness enables an automatic mindfulness response and allows us to recharge and refocus with emotional boundaries intact.

Once we’re more in tune with ourselves, it becomes easier to set emotional boundaries and make space to care for our well-being.

Behavioral medicine is not just for hospitals or therapy rooms, it’s everyday science for how we can respond to stress in real-time. What if that “weird vibe” isn’t just in your head but actually woven into your body’s biology?

This is what social psychologists call emotional contagion - the way we unconsciously "catch" emotions from the people around us.

When someone nearby is angry, anxious, or bitter, we tend to mirror their tone, posture, or facial expressions without realising it.

But this isn't just mimicry; it's absorption. Our brains are wired to protect us and the amygdala, our internal alarm system is always scanning for social threat.

That weird vibe can trigger a stress response, activating our body's "fight or flight" mode. Suddenly, you're restless, tense, or reactive and you don't know why.

It's not that you're "too sensitive"; your nervous system is simply doing its job, preparing you to either confront the perceived threat or flee from it.

But just because we feel it doesn’t mean we have to keep it.

Behavioral medicine equips us with methods to disrupt this pattern as the distinguished psychiatrist Viktor Frankl, so eloquently put it, "Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response."

So instead of absorbing every storm, we can choose to regulate, reset, and stay centered.

Essentially, it is about learning to stay emotionally regulated in dysregulated environments. This doesn’t mean ignoring discomfort, it means staying rooted in our own emotional frequency even as others waver.

Techniques like visualisation shielding (imagining a protective barrier around us), coherence breathing (slowing the breath to regulate the heart), and choosing intentional micro-breaks during the day can act as behavioral medicine - modern tools to re-align the mind-body system.

More importantly, we should normalise the act of checking-in with ourselves. Just as we hydrate or stretch throughout the day, emotional hygiene should be woven into our routine.

Did that conversation uplift or deplete me? Is this stress mine, or something I’ve picked up from the room? These questions return us to our internal compass - our most powerful tool in navigating emotionally complex environments.

So, how do we break the cycle of emotional absorption? This is where behavioral medicine offers practical solutions. It's not just for clinics; it's a daily guide to building resilience.

Techniques like mindful breathing can slow your heart rate and calm the amygdala, your brain's threat detector.

Body scans help you notice tension and release it before it turns into stress.

Grounding exercises such as feeling your feet, noticing textures or tuning into sounds brings you back to the present moment.

Think of these techniques as emotional Wi-Fi blockers - they help filter out the energy that doesn't belong to you, allowing you to stay centered and focused on your own emotional well-being.

At its core, calm isn’t a destination, it is a decision. As you learn to decode the invisible signals of stress, you no longer internalise what was never yours to carry.

Every interaction becomes a chance to reclaim your emotional space.

From a behavioral medicine lens, resilience can be reframed as a learned response: recognising unwanted energy as invisible stress and actively choosing—with conscious effort—not to carry what isn’t yours.

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